Okay, last post about Ello for a while, and my one and only bad Ello gag, I promise. Not least because I was told recently that someone is at ello.co/isitmeyourelookingfor, and that’s pretty much unbeatable.
But last night my friend Anab was saying that the Ello design felt much like “plunging into a deep dark hole of melancholia” for her. And I realised that that may be what I like best about it, and why my sole engagement so far has pretty much been limited to posting stills from grim black-and-white art films while declaiming Keep Ello Monochrome.
It’s the aesthetic. It’s supposed to be minimal and serious and authentic and (hair-shirt) ethical. But it is in fact Miserable Web.
Now that I’ve typed the words Miserable Web, I like the service much more than I did. And it doesn’t dismiss my previous conception of the place as “medical-grade internet,” either. Here is your grim prescription from Miserable Web. Meet the other patients. Enjoy your broken conversations in our infinite antiseptic white rooms, as if you were inmates in the cells of THX-1138. Consider the blank silence under our eyeless, lying smile. Even if you leave, the piece of you that loved colour and joy is still here, dying. This is Miserable Web. Say Ello.