For Local People

Coast-to-coast US book tour?  Yes.  New York Times-bestselling novel?  Yes.  Talking about your last book at MIT Media Lab in Boston? Amazingly. Visiting professorship at a university 250 miles away?  Yep. Speaking at the North London Literary Festival, fifty miles away?  Aye.  Invitation to a local authors’ event ten minutes from your door?  Which you found out about when someone saw a flyer and texted you to see if you even knew about it?

What do you think?  Of course not.

Sorry.  I just needed to say that out loud somewhere, small and petty and shitty as it is.  Fuck you, The Forum Southend. My books are in your fucking library.

Okay.  I’m done now.  Thar’s out of my system.  Thanks.

Off to Boston tomorrow.  Updates will arrive from my phone, doubtless with the formatting all fucked up.